Ok... I'll eat a bit of crow now.
I am starting to remember the spirit of Christmas.
My girlfriend came over with gifts for the children and the look on Jacob's face was priceless as he reverently placed them under his tree. To see this holiday through a child's eyes is something to behold. I had forgotten about the wonderment, excitement and the believing.... where along the way had I become jaded? Jacob believes. He believes in Santa, and that the world is a safe place, that Mommy and Daddy are his heroes, that he can be an astronaut or a fireman or a race car driver. He believes that his world is without limits. And that in one more sleep Santa will make his way to our home.
On another note, my husband came home last night telling me that he took 2 men who earn just above minimum wage, shopping. These men work outdoors and my husband noticed that their clothes weren't warm enough. So he took them to Mark's Work Wearhouse and told them they could pick out whatever they wanted and they were outfitted with proper winter attire.
I am starting to see that Christmas is an opportunity to put a genuine smile on someone's face. And that love, and giving comes in powerful, quiet forms.
So today, on the eve of Christmas, I feel more fortified than I did a few days ago. Maybe I can get through dinner with the outlaws. xo
I just might survive this holiday with a smile after all.