week deux

I'm on week two of my vacay. It is so hard not being on shift today. I know I'm an addict because soon as I am away from the firehall I start to get the jitters and start jonesing for the smell of cinders and ashes and the wail of the sirens. I miss my brotherhood. And I'll be darned if they go and have a three alarm without me today!

laughs and giggles

Well, it hasn't been all doom and gloom at the firehouse. After a rash of bad calls and even worse moods I feel like I'm back to my old self again. Although I must say the guys may sometimes prefer me when I'm a bit more serious (and not pulling pranks!). For some reason when I get the giggles I can't stop laughing. For. Hours. And it gets contagious. I just have to look at a crewmate and the giggles will set off. There were a few times when I literally had to step into the bathroom to try and gain my composure. The only thing that will wipe the grin off my face is when the alarm goes but inside I'm still grinning and doing the 'happy-fire-dance'. But anyway, for whatever reason one of my crewmates and I couldn't stop laughing while we were in the kitchen and I managed to grab a picture. My crewmate is gonna kill me if he sees that I posted his face but there is nothing more I love than sharing a big laugh and his grin is cute to boot so I hoping he won't mind too much. If I'm ever having a bad day I can just pull up this pic and it will set off the giggles again. Laughter IS the best medicine. xo

friday the 13th

Hey, just realized it's Friday the 13th. Kinda glad I'm off shift now to give my body and mind a chance to recoup but still secretly wishing I was working because things just happen on this date. I'd throw in a full moon as well and take on the werewolves. Goes to show you that we all have our addictions and a busy firehouse with crazy calls is mine.

slow day

When things are slow at the fire hall we tend to get a bit antsy... and I hate to admit it, we start craving a good call. Last shift was a snore... we couldn't stop pacing so to kill time, one of the guys brought out his smoker from the back of his truck and we smoked 8 racks of spareribs... one rack per firefighter. Heck, if you can't get called to smoke, might as well create some. :) Paleo pals, I ate the entire rack by myself. :)


But alas, after we digested, we were still bored so what did we do to pass the time? This:
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And because I just couldn't leave well enough alone and simply had to get in on the action:
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TA DA!
The Chief would not be amused.

ice cream remedy

I have yet to figure out if my relationship with my crew is more akin to roommates or old married couples minus the sex. Just by constantly working and being together, we get to know each other quite well, in a bickery, intimate way. I don't know if it's the humidity but we've all been a bit grumpy with one another. Every call we had seemed to be the farthest from where we happened to be and traffic for some reason had no clue that when a fire engine is coming down the street lights and sirens you must PULL OVER AND STOP. PLEASE!!! That and the fact that we ran 5 calls after 11 pm didn't help.... especially since they were to the same place and all false alarms. I dragged my poor arse home trying not to fall asleep at the wheel.... and I slept my day off away..... from 9 am to 2:30 pm!

We all have our quirks and our moods and our idiosyncracies. Some days what one might find utterly charming, the next day it might be completely annoying. I can be abnormally sensitive to my crewmates moods. The guys know this and if I can't remedy the situation with a smile or a hug, then after the next call, while the truck is out, I'll make a stop for a huge tub of cherries jubilee ice cream. That and a big pot of coffee and us enjoying a break and some conversation gets us back to our cheerful selves in no time.

We had a big rain last night so things have cooled off, and hopefully some of the tempers..... We're back on shift tomorrow. Maybe I'll bring in a tub or two of ice cream for extra insurance. xo

so fun I can hardly sleep!

Holy smoke. Took a couple of days to come down off the high. Last shift was insane. We had not one but two fires. :) The first fire was a pot on the stove so one crewmate might win firefigter of the year for grabbing the pot and running outdoors with it. ;) After ventilating, and placing a smoke alarm in their home (folks..... PLEASE make sure you have working smoke alarms and CO detectors), the call was done. In the evening we had a 2 alarm fire and I felt like I was in a movie. I was driving the ladder truck and had the pedal to the floor. On the radio I could hear that there was one severely burned person at the front of the house and someone else in distress from a knife wound. Then I heard a firefighter yell 'everybody out!'. I thought maybe the floors had collapsed. Turns out it was a home invasion. Upon arrival, Command asked us to suit up and stand on deck to make entry. When I jumped out of the truck I saw the SWAT team running down the street a la Flashpoint. We were at a working crime scene and there were coppers everywhere. We were at the call for a few hours and when it was time to go we were jammed in because of all the vehicles and bystanders. It was impossible to turn a 40 foot ladder truck around so I had to back up the beast something like 5 blocks in the dark. Took forever but didn't hit anything and my Captain was all smiles. There was money on whether I could do it or not.... it was pretty tight. The toughest part was not being able to set up for the next turn because there's no rearview mirror in the truck and so I had to rely on my crewmate to be my 'eyes'. It was total teamwork and trust. The irony is that by the time we got back to the hall, it took me two tries to back the truck into the bay and I told my crew with a laugh that I had used all my magic backing up powers and there was none left. I was soaked with sweat down to my skivvies but still gave my crewmate a huge hug. I LOVE MY STINKING JOB!!! Can't remember the last time I had this much fun!

Can't wait to see what tomorrow's shift will bring!

firefighters have curves

I often get asked why I chose to become a firefighter when there are a plethora of jobs that are deemed more 'suitable' for a woman. The simple answer would be that I'm made for this job. I have the genetics that make me strong giving me the advantage of height and heft, I understand the physics of fire and have a knack for hydraulics and the mechanics of operating different types of fire trucks. I love working with the public and crews. You don't need to be a man to do these things well. But having said all this, there are some inherent challenges to being a female firefighter and living life in the firefighting culture:

No matter how new or how much seniority you have, as a female firefighter, you are always being watched and judged. You will often be questioned about your ability, either by your colleagues or by the public. Because females make up 2% of the firefighting population, we stick out like a sore thumb and as such, we are not able to fade in the crowd. Everyone knows your name and this isn't always a good thing. If there isn't a rumour about you already, one will be made up. Any mistake made is magnified ten times over. All the female firefighters I know have very thick skins. I wear mine like a badge of honour. Thank God I have a sense of humour and never really give a rats ass what people think of me on or off the job.

A guy can go with his crew off shift and party and act like a dumbass and no one will blink an eye. Should a female firefighter do the same, her actions may haunt her for the rest of her career. There is that fine line between friendliness and flirtation. And while you want to be friendly and easy-going with the guys you work with, taking things a step further isn't the wisest choice. Things are usually fine until the big breakup then camps get divided. And the guys will remember you for who you dated rather than the great work you do on the job. The saying never sh*t where you eat applies here. As much as I would love to socialize with the guys off the job, if it's at an event where there is tons of booze being consumed, I tend to pass. Once I saw a captain who was so wasted he stripped down to his tighty whities. To this day I have a hard time taking him seriously, let alone am I able to look him straight in the eye. The image of him dancing on a table in skivvieis enough to send me to therapy.

The physical demands of the job are demanding. On everyone. Male or female. Firefighting is tough and not gentle on the body. For the women, add a pregnancy or two, the body doesn't get much of a chance to rest. After some days on the job, I crawl back home bone tired only to continue with my work running a household. This I suspect will not get any easier as I age. I do not look forward to menopause. The day I fear breaking a hip dismounting from the firetruck is the day I hang up my helmet. But as bad menopause might be for the gals, it might be far worse for the guys while we unleash on them as we go through it. Or fight to lower the station thermostat. Dudes, payback is a bitch. lol

Even if I won the lottery, I would still go into work because I love the chaos, the dirt, and the unknown that comes with the territory. And there is no other place apart from my own little family, that I feel as needed, loved and respected in spite of the ups and downs. Female or not, firefighting is my dream job. And while I may never be the greatest, the strongest nor the best, I am darn good at what I do. And that's all that really matters at the end of the day... and to be able to include myself in this band of brothers. xo

manopause?

Like all families, the fire hall gang is not without its own dynamics. Not sure if it was a full moon but during yesterday's shift, one of the guys with the most seniority decided to show his alpha dog stripes and started barking and unleashing his frustration about something seemingly mundane... and totally not worth losing sleep over. Normally I don't have a problem with this.... after all, we all have our bad days. Except that this dude was freaking on moi. Because the fire department is a paramilitary organization, I should technically defer to anyone who has more seniority than me. And in normal circumstances I would.... BUT.... because this guy kept barking at me long after his point was made, I was starting to lose my cool. If it's one thing I've learned in my almost ten years on the job, if you don't stand up for yourself, no one else will. And unless you're yelling at me to hustle because your ass or someone's else's is on fire, when it comes to yelling, I'm just sayin' don't. Nothing gets accomplished and nothing erodes morale more quickly. So, as this dude kept barking, I finally just barked back. This mama bear's roar is bigger than any dog's bite. Maybe not the most mature way for me to handle things but it quieted him down anyway.

Geez..... and everyone was so worried way back when that women on the job were going to be the moody ones.

the squawk box

There's this thing called a squawk box that resides in all firehalls and it looks like a brown speaker from the 70's. Apart from the firetruck, the box is one of the most important tools linking the firefighter to the call. They're mounted on the wall close to the ceiling in every room.... from the bay, to the kitchen, the dorm, even the bathroom. See?

in the bathroom:

in the dorm:

in the kitchen:

And so they hang, most innocuously and mostly unnoticed until the alarm goes off. In actuality, there's no alarm.... it's four beeps or rather, four 'tones' in quick succession that snaps you to attention no matter what you're in the middle of doing. The printer spits out the map, and more details and the dispatcher continues to give important information over the box with updates on the truck radio.

In the dark of night, the tones can wake the dead. It's a weird and slightly uncomfortable feeling getting jolted wide awake at 3 am and get your butt going to the call. Because we're a two truck hall, we train ourselves to hear the tones and see which truck dispatch is calling. If it's not our truck, we usually fall right back asleep with one eye or ear open.

Last shift I was on the ladder truck and the pumper went out close to midnight. I went down for some shut-eye and did not hear them come back. Nor did I hear the tones go off at 3 am for the pumper to go out, and didn't hear them come back again. So in essence, I slept completely through the call. Big no no. But I was lucky I was on the other truck so it didn't matter anyway but it's always a creepy feeling when you sleep through an alarm. I must have been really, really tired. Thankfully, I know that if it was my truck getting toned and I slept through it, the guys would have kicked my bunk to get my sorry ass out of bed.

the big four O

Well, I turned forty yesterday! And I have to say I had THE BEST birthday ever! I'm not one to really celebrate my birthday... not because I dread getting older but rather it's just that I prefer to lay low and chill. I happened to be on shift for my fortieth and just wanted to spend the day doing what I love most.... working and running calls. But my crewmates would have none of that. They wanted to celebrate so they did in typical firehall style. It began calmly with birthday wishes then the ribbing began... the teasing about me being middle-aged, calling me a 'cougar', making sure I didn't break a hip getting off the truck, and trying to find all my white hairs. And it went on and on...... All.Day.Long. And I couldn't stop laughing. I feel so privileged to be working with such an amazing group of guys. They made me my favourite dinner.... steak with mushrooms and onions, rapini, and baked sweet potato.


And what blew me away is that they made me cupcakes.... complete with sprinkles and candles, dimmed the lights and sang Happy Birthday and 'For She's a Jolly Good Fellow'. Now if you could picture a bunch of tough guys singing off key by candlelight, it's pretty touching. And one of the guys took pictures to boot and sent them to me so I could remember.....


And because the kids wanted to take part in the 'birthday party', my husband emailed a picture our babes with the flowers they picked out for me::


The guys packed up the leftover cupcakes for me to take home and share with the kids. They don't get sugary treats that often so they were in heaven. Maiya was loving it so much she started eating the paper wrapper which I had to pry out of her mouth.


I've said it before and I'll say it again. Life rocks. I'm one lucky lady. xo

feeling it

Mwuwahahaha....... yesterday's shift was a freaking blast. I was on the pumper which is the busier truck and forty minutes into the shift we had our first call..... and then they kept coming. And they were good calls that sent us running all day with our last call 10 minutes before shift change the next day. We had some good medical calls, carbon monoxide call, a forcible entry, two car rollovers... oh... and I saw flame. One was just a pile of rubbish some guy was illegally burning in his backyard and another was a grassfire.... it wasn't a fire fire but man, it spanned about 30 feet wide and ten feet hight and it was sure pretty lighting up the night. I wanted to hold hands and dance around it like a night druid but the guys would have thought I lost it. But secretly, I know they wanted to do the same cuz firefighters just love flame.

sistas

Everyday I am meeting more and more women who are applying to become firefighters. They are intelligent and well-read women who are choosing a blue-collar career. That says something amazing about this job. Although we are not performing brain surgery, we do need to think quickly and react within seconds to a crisis. Managing water flow off the tower as a ladder operator does require skills of a mathematician and a touch that is both delicate and tough. I think women have an innate sense of balancing both sides. When I was hired, there were less than ten women in a department of close to seven hundred. Now we are close to two dozen so it's nice to see the sisterhood growing. :)

I still find the physical and mental aspect of the job challenging every day. Especially as I get older lol... the body doesn't respond the way it used to. And mentally, some of the stuff you see can haunt you for life. I know some guys with post traumatic stress disorder that ended their careers. :( Perhaps because we are women, and letting our feelings show is more accepted makes us more immune. I'm not sure though... these disorders tend to build up over time and what you saw or experienced 10 or 20 years ago may resurface. Some experiences can be pretty grisly. I turn 40 next month and hope to put in at least another 15 years in this career. I will stay on the job as long as I can perform it as effectively as I can today. The stats aren't out yet since women haven't been in the fire business that long yet but I have a sense that our careers might be shorter lived simply due to the nature of our physiology, menopause and all those lovely things. I hope I'm wrong though. I find that I have never been more tired in my life now that I am a mom but these are the challenges that make me tougher I guess. It's been 9 years on the job and although I feel stronger it takes me longer to recover.

I love it when gals get hired. It brings a different vibe to the crew. My crew is amazing and are very accepting of me. We are like family and I love them to bits and we would give each others lives to each other both on and off the job. We all have our strengths and weaknesses and as a group gel nicely and not a day at work goes by without us laughing our heads off. I'm one of the lucky ones. Some of the dinosaurs out there hate working with women and can make life a living hell.

Enjoy the process ladies. The beauty is in the journey and it's one helluva ride :)

always there

There's a firefighter colleague who is going through some pretty difficult things in his personal life. I feel at a loss what to do. I know how to console a hurt toddler with a blankie and some milk, and I can wipe away my pre-schooler's tears over a broken toy and do my best to fix it with some glue. But my fireman friend, I can't patch his hurt with a Dora the Explorer band-aid... not even the strongest duct tape can mend his wounds. I could try to say all the right things but would end up sounding stiff and trite. I could hand him a beer but you can't do that at work. I could give him a hug but that's such a girl thing to do at the firehall and, it would embarrass him. Instead, I say we're going to shoot hoops out back and it gets him smiling a bit because I look like a drunk chicken because I really suck at basketball. Thankfully for the two of us we were saved by the bell.... because the alarm goes off. There is nothing like riding in the truck on the way to a call to make you feel needed, wanted, and that you make a difference in this sometimes all too confusing world. Those moments of focus when you're at an emergency, make you forget about time and space and even forget the turmoil of whatever you're going through. And maybe, just maybe, after the call, whatever crisis is happening in your personal life, it doesn't hurt as much. The beauty of our job is that even though few words are spoken at times of personal difficulty, there is a crew of guys and gals who will circle the wagons and be there ready to do anything they can to help when the time comes because we're family. Hang in there buddy. xo

un-fire business?

Never in my career have I remembered work being so slow. I know I'm sounding like I'm complaining and perhaps I am. I still haven't seen a fire since I've been back at work and this white cloud thing is getting a bit dull. Don't get me wrong.... we've been busy at work... just not fire busy. For example, yesterday's shift we had a call shortly after 8 am, then nada until the evening when the sh*t show began. At 10 pm, 1 am, 3 am, and at 6:50 am we ran calls which normally would make me happy but they were all medical calls of my not so favourite kind. There's this virulent gastro-intestinal bug that's still going around that renders the patients a vomitty diarrheal mess. Not much we can do at these calls except hold a bowl under their face, and pray the patient can make it to the latrine in time. And not get splashed in the meantime. You take their vitals and wait for the paramedics to arrive and high tail it back to the firestation trying to get the smell out of your nostrils and hoping that the next call will involve flame and double hoping that no one has made a stew for dinner because after all those medical calls you want to eat nothing reminiscent of slop.

station placement

I dare say it is the luck of the draw as to which platoon, station, and shift you are placed once you graduate from fire training. I'd like to think that they place you according to your skills, location from home, potential chemistry with the rest of your crew but I am not sure they do. I know they shuffle people around if there's a big problem but generally it's 'get along, we're not here to babysit your personality conflicts'. I also know that they have never put two women on the same crew.

Some guys love being at the high call volume station. I personally don't. The older I get, the less resilient I become at recovering from a sleepless night of running around. The way I look at it is we are all paid the same amount regardless of how many calls we respond to. And often these high volume stations respond to false alarms more than anything. Super slow stations are great if you're headed for retirement but it's not a great place to gain experience. The key I think is to be somewhere in between.

I love my station and shift. We're a 2 truck hall so more toys to play with and more firefighters to share ideas with. We're near the lake, major highways, and we have different types of building structures... low and highrise, commercial, and residential, nursing homes, and schools. As such, we gain experience with medicals, water rescue, extrication, and of course, different modes of attacking a fire. The only thing that makes me a bit nervous about being at this station is that it's coined 'chemical alley'. There are some petrol and paint refineries, factories that make chemicals that I am not able to pronounce but know that they are extremely toxic. A few years ago one of the refineries a few miles away literally blew up. We were sitting in station when the concussion hit and it felt like a Mack truck drove into the side of the station. I have never seen fireballs and flames like I saw that evening. I would be lying if I said I wasn't a wee bit scared at that call but I think being a bit frightened keeps you aware and safe. Thank goodness I have a crew that I completely trust to watch my back at a call. When it all boils down, all that really matters about this job is coming home safe and sound to our families the next morning.

great resource

For the fire buffs out there and people who are interested in a career in fire, check this out. It has all the information you'd ever need on recruitment, different departments, events.... and best of all it's Canadian and free. At one point I saw that they were hiring in Nunavut! I obviously couldn't apply but what an experience of a lifetime that would be!

as the red light turns

sigh..... I had completely forgotten how some days can be totally sucky at the firehall..... when there's more bickering and nattering than hens in a hen house. It's a case of where boredom breeds contempt. Or cabin-fever, or February blahs. I'm not exactly sure. But I am starting to dread shift change when we tag off with the next crew. There are four shifts (A, B, C and D platoon) that rotate through the week and inevitably, when there is a lull in calls the bickering starts. If one shift decides to move the cutlery to another drawer or rearranges the condiments in the fridge it invariably upsets the apple cart. There are shift wars on the time of day the trucks should be washed, how they're washed, and if a chamois or a squeegee should be used. The blame game gets started (instead of trying to find a solution to the problem) if a pry axe goes missing from the trucks or the fuel gauge is below acceptable levels. Sadly, it's usually just one or two guys who like to stir the hornet's nest and are so moody you'd think they were going through man-opause. Someone has been leaving the toilet in the women's washroom a filthy mess and I wish I had the balls to leave crazy glue or itching powder on the seat... so that arse will be stuck there for all of eternity and once he does get unpried he'll have a rash so bad he won't be able to sit down for days. Yesterday's shift-change was crappy with all the drama, but I am thankful that the boys on my shift have my back and will jump to defend me if anyone makes a snarky comment about me.

Sigh... I guess firefighters are not above human-nature and we can't escape the dynamics of being in a big 'family'. I hope it's really busy with calls in the next while so we can just focus on what really matters... having fun at work, and if we're lucky, maybe save a life.

rogue workout

As some of you may know, I am in the process of sneaking some fab new workout equipment into the firehouse. I say 'sneaking' because technically, I'm not allowed to bring in any equipment that has not been approved. Guess they're worried about us getting hurt or something. Each station is provided with the standard universal gym machine but I find the workouts limiting. I like my body to be the machine that moves the weights... not the other way around. Each station also has a recumbent bike but my arse goes numb after 10 minutes. So I'm being a rebel and I'm bringing in some cross training equipment and not a rock climbing wall so I think I'll be ok. So far I've brought in dumbells and a skip rope and someone brought in a heavy bag and some gloves. Figuring I might as well do this right, I just bought a set of gymnastic rings, a 20 kg kettle bell and a weighted vest from ExtremeKettlebell (The best prices and the best customer service I have come across in a long time). I'd love to get an Olympic lift bar and a set of bumper plates but I can't really hide that stuff in my locker so I'll have to save those lifts for when I'm at the gym. I'm trying to convince one of the guys to build a 24 inch plyo box and pass that off as a fancy stool if we ever get 'inspected'... lol ...... and if it's quiet at the station this weekend I may try to make my own 20 lb medicine ball out of a basketball and some sand... although I have images of the ball exploding because I haven't sealed it properly so I might just suck it up and buy a real one. I still think it's funny that I have to be so rogue about staying fit at work. I figure if we're gonna work out at work... we might as well do it right.

between a firefighter's bedsheets

Ha! Made you look.... ;)

I put together a photo collage for Jacob so he could 'see' me at work. It helps give him a visual of where I am when he misses me when I'm on shift. When he first started daycare, I made a similar photo album of our little family and his grandparents and all his favourite things and this helped him through the transition..... Anyway, I thought I'd share some of the pictures of my home away from home:

The firehouse.... only the ladder truck in the barn since the engine was running a call:


The bay (you've met the trucks in a previous post... so here's a good shot of the backends):



Our little yard for bbq and dining al fresco (although not so much in the winter):


A bit of a weird picture to post but I love the fact that I have my very own bathroom and shower! Not a big deal in most workplaces but a very big deal in a fire station. The first two stations I worked at I had to share bathrooms with the guys which after a chilli dinner was none too pleasant. And forget about showering. No way was I putting my dainty toes in a shower that a bunch of other men used... ick. Most fire stations never had women's washrooms since historically, there was never a need for one since there were no women on the job. Thankfully though, I am in a renovated station and even though this bathroom is no bigger than a closet, I am grateful they thought of me. :)




Possibly the most important room in the station... the kitchen! Notice the massive tin of Tim Horton's coffee? lol


Our dining/study/living/meeting room:


The workout room (which also doubles as another bedroom... those who snore are banished here):


And last but not least, what you've all been waiting for.... the bedroom... lol. This dorm actually sleeps 8 (four bunks along opposite walls) but I couldn't squeeze all the bunks in the picture. We each have a Murphy bed that drops out of the wall. Some guys think it's funny to fold you into the wall when you're sleeping. The Captain's each get their own room. My bed's on the very right.


Sorry gals, I didn't include any pictures of the guys.... they were all too camera shy. ;)

the guys

Phew! Had a busy shift with most of the calls after midnight..... Friday nights get a bit nutty with the bar scene. One guy took a tumble down a flight of stairs after twelve beers and as we were helping him a bar fight broke out.... fun times.... But I digress.

I wanted to give a shout out to my new crew.......... and how much I love working with them. I totally lucked out. Sometimes crews can do their job but lack cohesiveness and just sit around the firehall doing their own thing until the alarm goes. But these guys are like brothers in the truest sense and the laughter, banter and camraderie make me feel privileged to be part of this group. They range from 26 to 56 years of age and they are all adorable. The guys have the same weird sense of humour as I do and the same approach to work and play and really, our work is our play. There is no better feeling than looking forward to the next shift rather than dragging your arse into the office on a Monday morning. I'd literally skip and dance into work if it were cool... that's how much I look forward to work. It's great to love your job and even greater to love the people you work with. Wish I could post a pic of them. They'd kill me though...... or make me do all the station duties for the rest of the year... in which case I would rather not.